


"As Long As You're Okay, I'm Okay."

by iwritewhenimhappy



Series: Hope [1]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: 2x17, Angst, Gen, Mental Health Issues, Suicide, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-08
Updated: 2019-05-08
Packaged: 2020-02-28 06:32:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18750943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iwritewhenimhappy/pseuds/iwritewhenimhappy
Summary: “The officers will be there soon. He won’t be alone for long.” Maddie promises as she continues to type out the information she’s receiving from the caller and sending it to the police to help. “So let’s focus on getting you home safe. Take a deep breath. Calm down. What’s your name?”“Nicole.” She answers as Maddie’s eyes begin to tear up as the situation this woman is in becomes hauntingly familiar.





	"As Long As You're Okay, I'm Okay."

**Author's Note:**

> I did post this on my blog, but I thought I ought to post it here too. Please, let me know what you think.

“9-1-1, what’s your emergency?” Maddie asks in her calm but firm voice as she clicks accept to the incoming call.

“I need you to send someone to 225 Pinecrest Lane. I think my brother’s going to kill himself!” The caller yells in desperation and fear.

“Ma’am I’m having trouble understanding you. I need you to slow down.” Maddie says calmly and kindly. “What’s the address again?”

“225 Pinecrest Lane. My brother, he called to say goodbye, you have to hurry. Please! Send someone.”

“Police are already on their way. You said he called you, when was that and where are you?”

“A few minutes ago. I didn’t understand what he was saying at first- Dammit! Turn already! Move!” The caller yells as a honking beeps in Maddie’s ear. “I’m not going to make it in time. He’s all alone and- and I don’t-”

“The officers will be there soon. He won’t be alone for long.” Maddie promises as she continues to type out the information she’s receiving from the caller and sending it to the police to help. “So let’s focus on getting you home safe. Take a deep breath. Calm down. What’s your name?”

“Nicole.” She answers as Maddie’s eyes begin to tear up as the situation this woman is in becomes hauntingly familiar.

“Hi, Nicole, I’m Maddie. We’re going to get you through this together.”

_“We’re going to get you through this together.” Maddie promises with tears in her eyes as she kneels a few feet away from her brother. She makes sure to keep a distance after Evan freaked out and held the blade closer to his skin._

_“I- I don’t think we can.” Buck answers as tears start to fall. “I don’t know what to do- I don’t- Maddie I can’t.”_

_“I’m right here, little brother, I’m right here. I’m going to help you. We’re going to get you through this, I promise. Just- just put down the knife and let me help.”_

_“I- I can’t do this anymore. It- I can’t.”_

_“I know how hard it is- how difficult, but you’re not alone. Please, let me help.”_

“What’s your brother’s name?” Maddie asks, her voice not betraying the conflicting emotions that have arisen.

“Sam Foster.” Nicole says breathlessly.

“Does Sam have any history of mental illness?”

“He’s bipolar. Bipolar I.”

“Does he take medication for that?” Maddie asks.

“He takes- Ah, I don’t know. They switched his meds a few weeks ago. I can’t remember.” Nicole tells her, guilt dripping in her voice at not being able to remember, at not being a better sister.

“That’s okay.” Maddie reassures. “Has Sam attempted suicide before?”

“More than once.”

_“We can call mom and dad-” Maddie tries but is quickly cut off._

_“No!” Buck says in fear as his eyes turn up sharply to meet Maddie’s. “You can’t call them, Mads, not after last time.”_

“You said that he- he called you to say goodbye. What did he say?”

“That he loved me. That he was sorry. That he just couldn’t do it anymore. He was so tired.”

“You guys have been fighting like this for a while?” Maddie asks knowing all too well what this woman is going through.

_“I can’t do this anymore. I’m so tired, Maddie.” Buck says softly, painfully._

_“I know, little brother, I know. But you don’t have to do it alone. I’m here. I’m here.” Maddie assures as she walks closer. Buck doesn’t tell her to stand back or to leave. Instead he breaks, the tears overflowing as Maddie’s hand wraps around the knife and gently takes it away. With her free arms she wraps it around Buck’s shoulders and brings him close as the sobs escape him. Maddie can’t help but let her own tears fall too._

“Since college.” Nicole admits. “But I thought- I thought the meds were working. He seemed better. I wouldn’t have left him if- Oh God. I shouldn’t have left him. I shouldn’t have gone out.”

_“I shouldn’t have left you.” Maddie says with guilt. “I’m sorry. I thought you were doing better. You seemed better. I’m so sorry.”_

“Nicole, this is not your fault. Don’t even think about that right now. Just focus on helping Sam.” Maddie tells her as she tries to push her own feelings of guilt and hurt away.

“Right, I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s okay. I know it’s scary.”

_Maddie keeps holding him as her breath comes back to her. She was so scared, so scared of what he could have done if she didn’t come home._

“Has Sam ever been violent?” Maddie asks as she remembers that she has a job to do.

“Not to other people, just himself.” Nicole tells her.

“And he seemed okay when you left the house?”

“We had breakfast and he said he was having a good day. I believed him- wanted to believe him. It’s been so long since he felt okay and I thought for an hour we’d both just- just breathe. I’m here. I’m here. I’m turning up my street.”

“You’re- You’re at your house?” Maddie asks desperate to know what exactly is going on, if her brother is okay.

“I see police cars.” Nicole explains. “Why are there so many?”

 The call outs and Maddie is frantic.  “N- Nicole? Nicole?”

…

 Maddie dials the familiar number and holds the phone up to her ear.

“Hello?” A familiar voice asks.

“Hey, Evan.” Maddie says with a sigh of relief.

“Maddie?” Buck asks confused. It’s rare for her to call her by his first name. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah- no actually… Can we have dinner tonight? My place? I’ll cook.”

“Only if you make your famous bean and cheese dip. I haven’t had that forever.”

 Maddie chuckles at Buck’s enthusiasm, at how happy he sounds- is. “Sure. You’ll have to bring the wine though.”

“Deal.” Buck agrees readily, but then his voice turns more serious. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah- I just- As long you’re okay, I’m okay.”

“Okay, I’ll see you later.”

“Wait- Um, I love you, you know that right?” Maddie asks.

“I know.” Buck tells her sincerely. “I love you too. I’ll see you later.”

“I’m looking forward to it.”


End file.
